GOD: You had affairs with 120 WOMEN?

TIGER WOODS:
 Yes. 120.

GOD: 
As punishment, you will endure an injury-plagued 120 MONTHS with no Major victories. (Of course, you’ll still pay Elin $100 Million in the divorce settlement, but that's outside my jurisdiction)

TIGER: 120 MONTHS?! But I'm the best golfer in the world!

GOD: I don't care if you’re Jesus - you pay for your sins! LOL. 120 women - 120 MONTHS!

TIGER: But... my last Major win was the US Open in 2008! 120 months would mean the British Open in July of 2018?!?

GOD: It Could Always Suck More... at least I’m still going to let you chase Jack’s record - to resume in July, 2018... 120 MONTHS.

TIGER: But 120 MONTHS is 10 full years! I'll be 42 years old!! I couldn't even guess who our President will be then...

GOD: 120 Months. Final offer. And we shall document the conversation here: www.120months.com

TIGER: Ok. Fine. I accept my punishment. I'll wait 120 months to win my next major.. smh.. I'll wait until July of 2018... #120months

 


 

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